Ken's Conspiracy Korner - The Moon Landing - Ken U. Belevitt

DISCLAIMER: The opinions expressed in this article are fictional and intended only for entertainment purposes. The views expressed in this article do not express the views of carmensandiego.info. A lot of my contemporaries assume that since I am such a 1337 conspiracy theorist, that I must have a real government-throttling theory about the moon landing. Well, this will come as a shock to many of you, but I believe the moon landing was real. Yeah, yeah, I know. A wealth of information exists that legitimately discounts our presence on the moon. All sorts of stuff about improper delays of video, radiation form the Van Buren belt preventing chances of human survival, photographs showing improper physics or lighting principles. But all of this information can be safely ignored. Any amateur astrologer these days can use laser-guided devices to measure the distance from the Earth and lunar surfaces, providing accurate measurement of Apollo moon-landing data from an Earth’s distance. This is precisely why I’m writing this, fellow slash-and-burn farmers of the truth. This dual argumentativeness over the legitimacy of the moon landing is distracting us from the real cover-ups that are perpetuated throughout the world. What about government spending to cover up its 3 or 4 subsequent moon landings? What about other alien species that have endeavored to land on the moon, or even this planet? As conspiracy theorists, it is our responsibility to ask these questions and provide the answers. We choose to find the aliens! We choose to find the aliens in this decade and do the other things, not because they are easy, but because they are hard, because that goal will serve to organize and measure the best of our energies and skills, because that challenge is one that we are willing to accept, one we are unwilling to postpone, and one which we intend to win, and the others, too! Or something.